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Why Do Narcissists Want to Destroy You? (7 Reasons)

You have probably encountered a narcissist who could have been a lover, friend, or even a close family member at some point in your life.

Maybe it took you some time to learn their narcissistic tendencies, or you outrightly saw their true personality shortly after knowing them.

Some narcissists are great at hiding their true identity, while others have nothing to hide.

Either way, it helps greatly if you can identify a narcissist and keep a distance earliest possible before they destabilize you emotionally or, worse, physically.


Because narcissists are destroyers without remorse.

Here are the top reasons a narcissist would want to destroy you, but first things first…

Who is a Narcissist?

A narcissist is an individual with low self-esteem, which they try to hide by seeking validation from people and, in the process, hurting those close to them.

Narcissists don’t care how many people they end up hurting as long as their need to feel important is accomplished.

They also love being in control so that they can have an easy time destroying you.

So, why is a narcissist hell-bent on destroying you?

What do they seek to gain from hurting you?

Without further ado, here are 7 reasons a narcissist won’t stop at anything to destroy you:

1.   To Protect their Image

Narcissists love to prove their importance and superiority to anyone who crosses their path.

That’s why they will find a way to destroy you if they feel you are getting in their way or criticizing their flaws.

Narcissists feel threatened by those who know their insecurities, and to avoid the scrutiny, they embark on a mission to taint your name to protect theirs.

2.  To Feel in Control

Narcissists love being on top of things and don’t like it when you question their character.

A narcissist dislikes when you seem in charge of your life and will do anything to make you feel guilty for failing to pay attention to your well-being.

They want everything around your life to reflect on them and get upset when you don’t give in to their wishes.

You could be doing great financially, and a narcissist will find a way to destabilize your finances by, for example, coercing you to take loans on their behalf or saving their money while you take care of all the bills.

3.   They are Jealous

Resentment, grudge, envy, jealousy, and malice are all great words to describe the feelings a narcissist could harbor towards you because they feel intimidated by your successful life or career milestones.

Narcissists may also feel jealous because people naturally gravitate towards you and not them.

Their last resolution to getting you out of the way is tearing you down so they can reclaim their superiority.

4.  They are Sadistic

Narcissists derive joy and satisfaction from hurting others.

They love it when someone they perceive as a threat succumbs to their traps and evil schemes.

For example, a narcissist will go to lengths to stain your friendships if they feel you spend more time with your other friends than them.

They may accomplish this by selling fake stories to your friends about you so that they can hate you.

Seeing your friendships breathe their last gives them immense satisfaction and reminds them how much they control your life.

5.  They Lack Remorse

A narcissist can watch you walk into a trap they laid for you and not flinch or bat an eyelid as you scream for help.

Their lack of empathy or guilt is enough to push them to do unthinkable and dehumanizing acts to people they perceive as obstacles, be it their loved ones or friends.

Narcissists, therefore, go on a destructive mode without worrying about being held responsible or accountable for their actions because they have no emotions to begin with.

6.  To Punish You

Narcissists believe any erratic behavior from their loved ones or friends shouldn’t go unpunished.

 The erratic behavior could be failing to give in to their demands because you find them unreasonable or irresponsible.

Narcissists may also feel inclined to punish you if you call out their despicable acts because how dare you?

Narcissists hardly take NO for an answer, so when you don’t honor or fulfill their wishes, they switch on their destructive mode by finding a punishment that befits your disobedience.

7.   To Avoid Accountability

A narcissist will be compelled to hurt you if you keep poking holes in their weaknesses and calling out their erratic behavior.

They would rather destroy you than take accountability for their actions or work on their frail personality.

Narcissists have a hard time accepting their shortcomings and would rather eliminate people who challenge them so that they can retain their dominance.

Wrap Up

Narcissistic behavior can vary in different people.

Some may exhibit all the above destructive tactics, while others may display a few.

It is critical to keep your distance once you discover you are dealing with a narcissist for the sake of your mental health and physical well-being—whether they demonstrate all the above traits or a handful of them.

Also Read: Do Narcissists Know They Are Future Faking?

Kenyalogue Contributor


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