The most important man in everyone’s life is supposed to be the father. This could be a biological father, adoptive father, or even step-father.
However, the reality is somewhat sad, seeing that most fathers neglect their roles and responsibilities, and it is left upon the shoulders of the mother to cater to all of their children’s needs.
Do you have a deadbeat dad? Are you the deadbeat dad?
Let’s look at the most obvious signs.
1. He Is Never Home
We understand that all the fathers work day and night to provide for their families.
We give you a standing ovation for the overtime hours you put in every day, the never-ending meetings, and the business trips just to provide food on our table and cater to our other financial needs.
However, a deadbeat father spends all his time clubbing with friends and colleagues, only getting home in the wee hours.
You can never tell when he’s on leave or working, because you never see him.
He has all the time in the world to be with his friends but not his family.
2. He Never Takes His Kids Out
A loving and caring father always makes an effort to see their children happy, cheering and jumping up and down.
Every now and then, he takes his kids out for treats and fun days.
A selfish dad prefers walking around the streets like a bachelor.
He never wants to be seen somewhere with his children—whether it is at a restaurant, park, or kids’ play areas.
3. He Doesn’t Provide
This is the most obvious sign of an irresponsible father.
A dad is tasked by the unwritten social law of providing food, shelter, and education for his children.
This is supposed to be the case whether both parents are still together or not.
A self-centered father avoids taking on any responsibilities at all costs.
He sure wants to be recognized as the father, but his actions speak otherwise.
4. He Never Fulfils Promises
Some people are just big on making empty promises. They mention big things they hope to achieve, things they’ll do, and places they will take their children, but never deliver.
It is very hurtful to children, as it raises their hopes only to disappoint them later.
And since children forget quite fast, this puts them in a never-ending circle of pain and frustrations.
5. He Only Lives for ‘Today’
It is the duty of a father to make sure their children’s future is secured.
This means making smart investments and taking up education and life insurance policies.
On the contrary, a deadbeat father only makes decisions based on ‘today’.
Nothing holds him back from gambling all his income, reasoning that he’ll make more tomorrow.
6. He Never Takes the Blame
A deadbeat father always finds someone to blame for whatever mistakes he makes.
He will either blame it on the mother or even the kids.
And not just this. He finds fault in everything others do around the house.
7. He Never Has Time to Listen to His Kids
Ever seen a little child trying to have a conversation with his father and get blown off with a statement such as, “Can’t you see I’m busy?” It is the most painful thing to watch.
True, fathers are mostly busy and we love them for that, but a deadbeat dad will always use an aggressive tone when addressing his young ones.
Whether approached at an opportune time or not, a loving and caring father takes time to reason with his kids why he cannot listen to them at the time.
Then he makes a point to sit down and talk later, keenly listening to them expressing themselves with little to no distractions.
8. He Doesn’t Follow Up On His Kids’ Academic or Social Progress
A responsible father takes time off his tight schedule to make appearances for parents’ meetings at their kids’ school, keep in touch with their teachers, and follow up on their school work and performance.
If you want to point out an irresponsible father, simply just ask him the name of his kid’s class teacher, or his son’s best friend.
9. He Never Disciplines His Children
Since most mothers are home with the kids a lot, some people incorrectly assume that it is her responsibility to discipline the kids.
But even the Bible clearly states that this is a responsibility for fathers and for a good reason.
Women are quite emotional, and they will either be lenient with the kid or take the discipline too far.
A responsible father recognizes this and performs his duty as expected.
A deadbeat dad, on the other hand, will just sit back and wait for the mom to do all the scolding, yelling, and grounding.
After all, he is never home, so how will he even see his kids making mistakes and try to rectify them?
10. He Always Compares His Kids
I’d love to see a family with siblings who share everything in common.
Each child is born different, even identical twins have distinguishing factors about them, from physical appearance to personality differences.
I was raised in a community where most fathers only established bonds with kids named after his side of the family, dimming those named after the mother’s side as illiterate, useless, or lesser than.
A responsible father loves each and every single one of his kids, and even when he has a soft spot for one of them, he will never show it.
